Sunday, October 30, 2011

Maximum Riot Rock

We're now over a month into the Occupy Wall Street movement and I'm starting to wonder if anything real or lasting is going to come of it.  My guess is, that eventually people are just going to get bored of the whole peaceful protest thing, and when the last hippy leaves, the forces of evil will go in, clean up the used condoms and Egg McMuffin wrappers, and then get on with business as usual: making the world a shittier place for you and me.

Already, the remaining protesters are starting to seem like the stragglers at a once-raging house party.  The Man has to stay up and keep his eye on them so they don't steal his stereo, but he knows that pretty soon, they'll all go home, wash their Che Guevara T-shirts, fire up the bong, and settle down to evening of reading Marcuse or watching 9-11 conspiracy videos.

Get in there and crush them before they start singing "Kumbaya."
I hate that fucking song.
And what then?  What becomes of the first large-scale public uprising in America in almost a generation?  Maybe nothing at first, I'm told.  Hey, these things take time, right?  Political consciousness needs to be raised.  Alliances between seemingly disparate parties formed.  The masses need to be galvanized, not along the familiar political lines of Right and Left, but according to the universal, immutable principles of Right and Wrong.

Basically, blah, blah, blah, Rome wasn't built in a day.

Part of me sympathizes with this approach.  I mean, when it gets right down to it, I'm a lover, not a fighter.  Given the proverbial Friday night choice between fucking and fighting, I'll take fucking, and so should you.  It'd be nice if love really could conquer all, but as so many of us have realized, love often isn't even enough to save a relationship, let alone the world.  And let's face it, Wall Street can't be saved.  It doesn't need to be occupied, either.  It needs to be razed to the fucking ground Hiroshima-style and the bankers and their political sycophants that aren't completely incinerated ground up into free hamburger meat to feed the poor.

Rome may not have been built in a day.  But it was burnt in one and it's about time we lit that motherfucker up.

From American Apparel's "Black Flag Collection:
Leather, zip-front "mad-bomber" jacket: $399
Bolshevik-gold, woollen scarf: $49
Hair by Vidal Sassoon, Beirut.
The Age of Aquarius is over, kids.  We gave peace a chance.  It didn't work.  As far as I'm concerned, what The Man needs now a good, hard, hate-fuck, and the best place to bend him over is in the streets, right in front of the Fox News cameras.

It's time to riot, bitches!

For those about to wreck, I salute you!  Here are some playlist recommendations for your ipod.


The Dead Kennedys: "Riot"

Maybe the best song ever about the perks and pitfalls of going to battle with the man.  Jello Biafra and company capture the giddy glee of hurling manhole covers through a Taco Bell window yet warn of the potentially futile clash with a better armed, better organized opponent.  Watch out, kids.  As Jello tells us, "Cops can riot all that they please."
  

Bob Marley: "Burnin' and Lootin'"


Bob usually sticks to preaching the love and praising Jah, but as he was well aware, sometimes even them belly full of Jamaican patties and a lungful of ganja smoke just doesn't fucking cut it, blood clot.  I and I is hungry for meaningful political change... and a pair of Air Jordans, a bottle of Crown Royal, and a hella big plasma screen.




Blitz: "Someone's Gonna Die Tonight"

In any constructively destructive act, the forces of mookish thuggery need to be given a certain amount of leeway.  And nothing gets a gang of ballcapped date-rapers to smash glass and light shit on fire quite like this ode to indiscriminate hooliganism by the British Hardcore band, Blitz.




N.W.A.: "Fuck Tha Police"

Not all cops are bad.  Just most of them.  Unfortunately, even the good ones are still the unwitting minions of the Dark Lord, Sauron and, as such, they're also likely to be the first of the nocturnal forces we clash with.  And they'll have to be fucked.

Preferably in the ass with their heads down the porta-potty hole.